Nostalgia

A Summer Flower Reflection!

Fragrances of flowers can bring back memories of long ago, sweet scents
of perfumes

perhaps turning a sad memory into a happy one!


Sitting on the blue quilted chair in my nightie
I watched intently as she dressed for the party
my elbows resting on the table.
As she slowly drew her dark stockings then
pulled a slip over her head, gracefully stepping
into a black dress clinging to her thin little body.
Her dark hair combed with care, pulled back
with a shiny barrette and with a finishing touch
a necklace of pearls and matching earrings.
She stood before the mirror, a light from the
window falling upon her – and she was beautiful!
Like a lustrous pearl in emerald green grass – and I
loved her so much, even though she was out of
touch with her little girl. Reaching for a small
lavender bottle of perfume, she applied the sweet
scent behind each ear and then smiling at me
dabbing a drop on each of my cheeks with a
teasing grin. It melted into my memory, my
skin was perfused with the scent of my
mother, as she bent low and kissed me goodbye!

Weeping sunflowers . . .

Do sunflowers ever cry?

Where once your smiling faces chased the sun

Y

It’s been 6 months since the devastating Ukrainian War began! Starting in February of this year, when in a few short months their sunflowers would begin to sprout and grow, but for [now] are never more!

Where are your fields now, Oh weary ones of war?
Where once your faces chased the sun!
Your apron’s nourishing seeds
feeding your nation and world!
Now artillery and smoke have hidden your smiles
your golden vials of oil are broken
But down below your hardened soil your precious
seed is hidden, your tears will sprinkle your
meadows, bringing your smiling faces once again!

summer vacation. . .

A Vacation Reflection!

Can anyone relate to
going on a
vacation with a head
full of worries and
concerns until it

SEEMS IMPOSSIBLE TO LET GO AND HAVE FUN?

I’m going on vacation, but I’m leaving behind
that part of [me]that fusses and fumes
insisting on taking excess baggage that weighs
me down! My baggage will be easy and light.
Just what I need from the chatter that doesn’t
really matter!
Just even for an hour would do,
to introduce a new thought or two!

Good blessings on this Friday evening. . .

On this first Friday of August 2022!

Through our busy week with hectic schedules and earthly demands,
we have not been forgotten…on this Sabbath ‘eve we have been given
a restful day of CELEBRATION!

All things in the past

FORGIVEN!

Resting places have arisen
the magic number seven
opens the door of heaven
This is new to be here
I knew not I would rest here
things seem so clear here
The roses I behold
before I had not presence
of mind to see the beauty
they hold
Prone to share this heavenly
splendor
I seek one as I, to ever press
on together!

weeping angels. . .

Good evening! As the Sabbath hours
are approaching – And have arrived in
distant lands!

Have you ever wondered if angels get tired and weary?
Do they cry when they see our pain and feel our loss,
when we ignore their care and forget to trust?

Weeping with tears of things done here, but with unfolded wings ever returning, doing His bidding!

the old bent fence . . .

The tools we have used to survive – managing our lives –
sometimes fail, leaving us with little strength to face our battles within and without! Our fences confine us, our walls divide us hindering us from sharing hope with others!

A gale came up – the wind blew
The old weakened fence was almost
rent in two
Now it is bent and ready to fall
taking only a small gust causing
part of the fence to collapse
the remaining taking up the slack

Sitting on a bench surveying the damage
I thought about others –
some of us are strong and some of us are tall
and some of us have no hope at all!

Like the fence – the load is too heavy
Life’s storms weaken – and we fall, but when
we take our eyes off of our storms and gales
we become a help to others!

The curtain…

A Reflection on grief and mental illness . . . It was a warm summer morning in the month of July, as I sat in the office waiting to be released. I was given instructions to return every week to attend group therapy. The doctor had prescribed strong drugs to avert the suicidal ideation thoughts that brought me to this place. I was prescribed anti-psychotic meds, with Lithium used for this problem. Since I was drug resistant to antidepressants for depression, I was prescribed Nardil and its
family of (MAOI) Inhibitors. When my ride finally arrived I was bid goodbye, and now on
my own. The door shut behind me and I felt the warm sun on my skin, heard
the sound of cars and an airplane and train that echoed in my mind. I felt alone and
wasn’t sure I would make it. Trying to resume my activities was a challenge. Sometimes
it was difficult to get out of bed. On one particular day I was staring at the ceiling fan
and counting the blades as they turned in circular motion, counting and obsessing were
part of my illness. The incessant numbers and words locked in my mind. But even
though I felt fearful and afraid, there were times of uplifting experiences which gave me
hope that I wasn’t alone in this battle of my mind. One such experience I will share,
that I wrote to poetry, seeming a bit redundant, but that was the only tool given to me,
journaling these moments to give me courage when I would begin to lose hope.


Called – ‘The Curtain’

Is it a dream? It seems as if it is – waking with a start
I know it is not
Opening my eyes to this illness, there is no one I can confide
How it came about I could not explain, searching for an
answer to a troubled mind

Reaching for my robe with throbbing pain and
rapid pulse making an effort to stand by my bed, a brittle
soul about to break, falling back down into slumber again

There is a stirring as I awake once more
saying a prayer “Please my soul to take”
Crispness of sheets brush against my skin
a fever begins and my body seems to melt
sheets now wet with the trickle of sweat

Beginning to thirst and bereft of water I
become hotter, beginning once again to falter
the hopeful anecdote to my illness has provoked
it instead, another potion has created more
mental commotion

The walls seem empty as I stare in space searching
for anything to break the dreariness of this place, on the
left hangs a picture dismal and grey, to the right a window
dressed in lavender and white hanging from a silver rod
could this be a gift from God?

I must see it better, slowly lifting my head
from the bed, moving my legs to the floor, reaching
for the wall with trembling hands, pulling the
curtain to my side as I cry
“This piece of cloth I wish to hang above my head”

As I try, my arms are not high enough, my
hammer and nails strong enough, I sit in the midst
of failure and quit, in my brokenness something greater
than I draws the curtain aside, and with His rod
accurate and right He drapes His banner of love*
over me. . .

God’s hands became my hands, giving me
strength and accuracy to secure the rod,
and to this day the curtain hangs above
my bed!

*Song of Solomon Chapter 2:4